"No. I Can't"

I need to send a package to Hong Kong.  I call DHL on my cell.  They will recognize my number and my address in Beijing will populate the young lady’s, (it’s always a young lady) screen.  I will pick a time when I’d like them to come.   She will ask for the zip code in Hong Kong and I will inform her that there are no zip codes in Hong Kong.  She will begin to give me an approximate amount for the shipment and I will tell her it doesn’t matter.  I already know  how much it will be.  She will ask if there is anything else?  I will say “no”, and we will end the call. 

I step up from my computer and head over to the living room to make the call.  The reception is unreliable in my office.  I am told in Chinese and in English that my call may be recorded.  The lady answers and I begin the ritual conversation, which stops abruptly when she informs me in Chinese, (these phone chats with DHL are necessarily in Chinese) that she does not know my address. 

“Did my number populate in your system?” I ask.  “Yes.”  “Well.  Then you should be able to see my address.”  “I can’t”  “Can you see my name?”  “No.  I can’t”  “Can you read my number off?”  She reads it off properly.  “Please tell me your address,” she repeats.  I do not want to read off my address because she will ask for which precise “yu” character it is that I am referring to, when I mention the name of my compound.  I will be unable to explain which "yu" intelligently.  This is stress inducing.  “Why is your system not showing my address?” I ask, avoiding her inquiry. 

Eventually it does populate and we can resume the standard meander through all this.  When the DHL guy arrives at my door a few hours later, I head out and ask for the form to fill in.  “We aren’t doing it that way any more.  I need to enter it all into this thing,” he says, showing me his handheld device.  I consider if this will take more or less time and decide that it sucks for him but for me I can go back to the other room while he fills in the address I provided for him.  I’ve never seen this guy.  I ask where the other guy is.  “He’s not here today.”  I see that.

Friday 09/15/17